What Men Want
The March issue of the magazine Men’s Health had an article entitled “What Makes Men Fall Love?” by David Zinczenko. Being a man who fell in love 29 years ago and is still in love after 24 years of marriage, I was curious about currently attracts my fellow males who are still involved in the pursuit of happiness.
So I decided to read this article, and I discovered (according to a national Harris Interactive Poll) that “sixty percent of men deem friendship the most important thing in a relationship. Sex comes in at a skimpy eight percent.” The writer continued by stating four things a man wants in a woman. Ladies, are you ready to find out what your prince charming is in search of when he comes knocking at your door? Gentlemen, are you ready to discover what you did not know you wanted when you knock? Well, here we go:
1. Men want a woman with a passion in something other than her man. Wow! How humble! How selflessly not desiring to be the center of her universe! Sorry, I could not help myself on this one.
2. Men want a woman who has no problem with guy time. This means she needs to be ok with him spending time hanging out with his buddies from time to time.
3. Men desire a woman who has a strut. Now that’s a word I have not heard in a very long time—strut. However, this means that a man wants a woman with “attitude”, “sassiness”, “confidence”, “charisma”, “charm that shows she can be a little bold and a little daring.” Folks, I’m quoting what the article says.
4. And finally, drum roll please! Let’s open the envelope carefully. Men want a woman with a good taste in ties. In other words, he wants a woman who can provide him with a little gentle guidance in areas of life where he may not feel confident. Again, emphasis on the word “gentle”.
So, ladies and gentlemen, are these the four qualities that top your lists of what you need to be to your man, or what you have to have from your woman? How do these four qualities compare to the capable woman found in Proverbs 31 (New Living Translation)? Is there really something to this list? For example, #4 resonates with verses 11 & 12, which say that “Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life. She will not hinder him but help him…”.
Part of this list actually sounds very Biblical, but hey, I invite your thoughts!
sending...
I find this interesting and–perhaps with the exception of #3–it comports really well with “the virtuous woman.” “King Lemuel” talks at length about the hard-workin woman, which suggests a passion for diligence. This is more than just pleasing her husband. Rather, she likes to work! She reaches out and touches people’s lives through her labors (see veres 19-20). She lets him spend time with his buddies so that they know him at the gates of the city (verse 23). And the tie connection is covered above. But perhaps one can find even a connection to #3. Consider verse 6: “she considers a field and buys it.” (NASB) This is a decisive woman who knows what she wants. Is there a more confident example of “strutting” than that?
I am truly surprised that “respect” did not come up yet in this conversation. Oh, it’s a given that a woman respects her man, right? No. There are many women out there who have no respect for their men, or for men in general. The reason for this may stem from bitter past experiences, but they exist nonetheless. I think that we get caught up with the man the respects his woman–and that’s GREAT, but I think that we have to get back to the idea that perhaps a lot of feminsits would have a problem with. Honestly, I feel I might be betraying women when I say this in a slight way, but women need to respect their men. I am in NO WAY saying that woman cannot have a “strut”, but in my experience sometimes the strut needs to be toned down (a little), especially when the relationship is serious, such as marriage. Again, it surprises that men did not highlight respect, but perhaps Men’s Health thought that it was so “normal” that it did not need to be said?–I hope not–that would be way too much “strut” on their part.
I found the topic and the thoughts behind very eye opening and refreshing to hear from a man’s prospective. Women (young and young at heart) definitely have to come up to the mark and realize our original value and place in creation. We have to have respect for outselves first before we expect others to have it.
When I read this blog a few weeks ago, I thought to myself “The desires of boys and men are worlds apart.” You see, as a young woman I find that many young men my age have not yet reached the level of maturity necessary to find, recognize and respect a young woman. In other words, these young “men” are really old boys. Now, when it comes to young cats in the world, I’m not really bothered, especially since they’re not an option for this woman of faith. What disappoints me is the fact that so many young Christian men just don’t get it. As a result, young sisters either settle or come to the conclusion that they must wait years for their male counter-parts to grow spiritually. Knowing that I want my MOG (Man of God) to be the spiritual head of my home, I take the position of the latter group of sisters and choose to wait, rather than settle for the immature tendencies of boys masquerading as men.
I am a single female and understand that men want women that they can respect. I have always wondered how a man could possily respect a woman who do not respect herself. He can not and will not. Women have to stop being sleezy looking…always trying to entice a man. Men are already visual…they look at shapes…legs…and other things and base their likings on the outward appearance of women. However, when women dress in revealing clothing it takes away from the male curiosity. Women must stop this madness. Let a man desire us for what we really are from the inside out. I personally want a man to give me the highest respect,therefore I respect myself first. Oh yeah…open the door for me brother!! I appreciate that kind of stuff, pull my chair out brother and I’ll say thankyou sir!! look ladies treatment like that from a man is what he want to do but will not do if he feel that it’s not necessary…don’t cheat yourself of this treatment. Let him call…stop calling him…(all the time). Men are hunters…let them persue, and when he finally get you he’ll most likely stay if you treat him with reverence. Not at all saying to play hard to get game , I’m actually saying..be a woman of character and let the man do his job finding you and pursuing you. Men love their freedom…lets not rob them of that ,and just be patient..eventually if he really loves you he will approach you carefully.